Questions

In everyone's lives, there will always be that time where we will ask ourselves why certain things happen in our lives; things that may make us think the whole day, things that may make us be confused with stuff, things that may make us ask ourselves, Why?

Often times, this happens when it concerns the heart. We ask ourselves, Why now?  or, Why should this happen? or it can even be Why should it happen to me?. Of course, there's that question Why should it hurt this much?

This whole day got me thinking a lot because of everything that's happening around. In other words, it just triggered me to thinking, trying to answer the unanswered, look for clues that may lead me to that X Spot I've been trying to go to, trying to clear things in my mind.

Now, I ask, is it wrong, or even crazy, to still miss, or be in love with the person from your past? A person who you shared your life with before? The person you thought would be The One? Even if, you got hurt so much in the end?

I've been trying to search for the answers to my questions, and yet, here I am again, clueless of what I should do. Sometimes, I ask myself, will this still be worth it? There's pain, giving me the reason to just let go and move on but, there's love, giving me the reason to not let go, but to stay, try to be strong, and continue to fight for what I really feel.

Contradicting, huh?

What's even hard is when you tell someone you just want them to be happy. When you see them happy, it hurts sometimes, knowing that you're not the one making them smile, or making them feel better. Sometimes, it's really hard to say I'm happy for you. because, you really are happy, but at the same time, it hurts.

Sometimes, staying and trying to look at the present depresses me, but when I think of what may happen in the future, it kind of lightens me up. But, what's the chance of that happening, right?

Some things in life are easier said than done. When someone is in the situation, I can easily help them, but when I'm in the situation, it's hard for me to even do what I tell others.

That's life. It can really mess you up. At one point, you will feel like you're okay, but once you're all out, you will just feel really exhausted.

I just feel incomplete, knowing that the person you shared a part of your life with, is not there anymore. I'm all alone now, by myself.